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I recently watched a speech given by Daniel Kahneman at TED in February 2010. It discussed how what we actually experience and the memory of what we experienced often differ greatly. In other words, there is a difference between your “experiencing self” which is experiencing life as you go, and the “remembering self” that handles the memory of what you’ve experienced.

Perhaps an example might help demonstrate this idea. Imagine that David has a one week vacation that results in an amazing time. His “experiencing self” has one week’s worth of awesome experience. His “remembering self” records the memory of an awesome vacation. Now let’s move on to different scenario. Imagine that instead of a one week trip, David went on a 12 day trip. While the first 10 days of this trip were amazing, the last 2 days weren’t enjoyable because of poor weather and an error in planning his itinerary. Comparing these two examples, the “experiencing self” in this second scenario received an additional three days of a great vacation (10 days vs. 7 days). Therefore, despite the rough ending of the second scenario, he should have enjoyed the 12 day trip more overall. However, our minds don’t work that way. Our “remembering self” ultimately judges the week-long trip as more enjoyable because it was positive throughout and ended on a strong note. Although David should rationally have derived a more enjoyable memory from the second scenario, he actually took away a more positive memory from the first scenario. The fact that our minds function this way has been proven with studies on the duration and discomfort of medical procedures (view the video below to see the research).

I’ve had similar experiences with nights out with my friends. If the night starts off slow and dull, but eventually picks up and finishes strong, I retain the memory of a great night out. However, if the evening starts out great and then towards the end of the night something negative happens (someone gets sick, loses their keys, etc.), I’m left with a rather unpleasant memory of the night.

The takeaway here is to do your best to always finish strong. The difference between a lasting positive experience and a lasting negative experience is how it ends. If you ever find yourself faced with a negative turn of events, rise to the challenge and do your best to flip the situation around. Finishing strong will do wonders for how you remember your experiences, which will result in increased satisfaction and happiness with life.

Based on this research, finishing strong can also help you become more successful in achieving your goals. If you consistently end on a positive note in your endeavors, your mind continually stores positive memories of these situations. This filters down into your subconscious and slowly shapes your self-image and your beliefs about your ability to tackle your goals.

Although it is impossible to ensure a positive finish for every event in your life, understanding the role of a positive ending on your recollection of your overall experience will motivate you to finish strong whenever it’s in your power to do so.

Check out the video below if you wish to see Daniel Kahneman’s presentation on the research behind this idea: